He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
I'm sorry but I have to break up with you. My wife is pregnant and can't have a girlfriend too.
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im suggesting it to him. and by suggesting i mean we're not having sex again unless im wearing high heels
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
Welp just pooped in a garbage can. Guess I'm not better than you at life in any aspect.
I was so drugged up it was amazing, I felt like a dinosaur "because I enjoyed spinach, and I got apple juice and only dinosaurs get apple juice" according to me the day of, and last night I felt like a rocket ship
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ah that wonderful moment when you realise the bookmark you were using in a book you lent your mum is actually a receipt from a strip club
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
Dude, tumbleweeds have been rolling through my bed lately. This is my dryest dry spell since I was married.
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
I went up to u at the bar, you grabbed my face and said, "hey you're Juan right?"
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