My fight-or-flight response is really more fight-or-fuck
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
When I told her that her boyfriend was making out with another chick, all she said was "which one"
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
I WILL PAPERCUT YOUR URETHRA YOU DO NOT STEAL A MANS SECOND BIG MAC
She insisted on cleaning her room in the dark. 5 minutes in, she forgot what she was doing and started putting shirts on instead of hanging them up.
I am playing a little game I like to call "How Quickly Can I Infuse This Vodka Into My Bloodstream Without the Use of an IV"
Apparently "dick me" was not the response he was looking for.
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
I want to name my colorful bowl Batman. Why? I still have yet to figure it out. But I'm calling it Batman.
I'm tripping pretty hard right now but every time a Volvo drives by I feel like everything is gonna be alright
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
Randomize
