I mean I can't believe yesterday ended w/ your house getting firebombed. What an unexpected turn of events
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
She's locked herself in the bathroom with a tub of icecream and she's watching my little pony on her phone. We know it cause she sings with them.
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
I just had to explain to my 62 year old advisor what "tea-bagging" was in the middle of her lecture. I smell extra credit. And maybe a demonstration.
The chick working the drive through at BK on New Years stuck her head out the window and told me there were no line ups for the bathrooms inside so i should go in there. I just kept squatting and peeing and told her it would prob help business.
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
My Canadian brought me three bottles of maple syrup, a sunflower, and a pair of Oakleys back to the states...he's either drunk or he loves me
my friend was passed out in the bathroom so I threw up in the coffee maker, not the pot the water reservoir that kind of drunk.
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
Randomize
