even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
If its vodka, everyone is attractive. Tequila, everyone is dead sexy, single and fuckable.
But I always wanted my obit to read "Died violently in casino orgy," not "Never woke up from rectal surgery."
The stripper from Delilahs paid the desk clerk to find out my room #. Either Im doin something very right or she's doing it worng.
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
I just bought the ATT family protection plan so that I could block all of my old bar hookups from booty calling me...
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
You told me that you would let her eat cake off of your ass, then fell asleep on the floor
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
you were grinding on the cop whispering for him to lend you his tazer.
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
Randomize
