its sad that the first thing i assume is that ur trying to indirectly tell me you fucked on a breakfast table
by asking you if you bought one for the apartment?
I woke up with ten beers in my bag that hoarded at the party last night. Rally? Its five somewhere.
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
If my nicknames are based on what I throw up, you can call me Jimmy Johns
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
He googled "how long will i be drunk" and just started crying
if u cant get laid at this wedding we need to have a looooooong talk about the possibility of u becoming a lesbian
heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i told myself when i was 16 i would never fuck an Alan. now i've fucked 3 and i'm punching my 16-year-old self in the face
DAMMIT Im supposed to be running a company not discussing dick piercings!
Dude my pants were only on for 20 minutes after she got there.
That's 30 minutes too many.
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
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