Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
Your mouth is God's brothel.
i kinda do this "flirt with girls and pretend to be a hot white guy named chris" thing
no, i dont want the owner to like me bc i dedazzled my vagina
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
you asked the janitor if you could ride his floor cleaner.
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
He left an apology note saying he had to work and that there was coffee, OJ and food on the table with two Excedrin. I left his spare key with the door guard and she said "too bad I don't go for skinny white boys or I'd jump you both!" Best one night stand ever.
I have to call my new boss to accept the job offer so you have pack the bowl while I pretend I'm a responsible adult THEN we can get high
I managed all three standard threesome configurations a female-bodied person can achieve in just under nine years. I want to high-five everyone involved, but I've lost touch with a couple of them
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
Randomize
