it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
that speech was about as successful as her performance in twilight
I've eaten ice cream, mentos, an extreme gulp and swedish fish today. i feel like diabetes. the actual disease not a person with it.
i thought i'd fucked her to death. no lie. she just stopped moving.
may have given a homeless man 70 dollars in exchange for his sandals. so yea, i'm going as jesus for next halloween.
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
I. Did. In fact. Sprain. My liver. This. Weekend.
I have major gossip for you.
Oh no, did you have sex last night?
If I had sex last night I'd probably post it on facebook. It's been that long and I'd be that excited.
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
Apparently the girl he banged in the bathroom yelled at him for hitting on me all night. But whatever, he was holding her hand for most of it
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
Randomize
