so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
Nothing says walk of shame better than a onesie and a 12 pack of corona..
For when you/if you wake up tomorrow.. You broke 4 of the bar's glasses tonight and I am currently watching you as you ride the broom around the bar instead of cleaning up your mess. I am no longer able to come up with excuses for you.
Everyone is slow dancing to Aerosmith. I am serenading a slice of pizza.
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
He ripped off my pantyhose and all I could think was, "oh no those were clinic-appropriate!" That's what I get for ditching a continuing education meeting to go hook up with my scuba instructor.
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
We got hammered last night and I woke up this morning with texts from 'iron maiden chick.' wtf?
If you buy me a steak I will make the extra effort to ride you. If not, I'm just gonna lay there.
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
I'm praying to the gods of sex we both get laid this weekend. Amen. Love you
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