Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you think county jail has a Groupon?
You called a girl at 4:30am to tell her "your pussy is my top priority" while simultaneously Urban Spooning late night cafes.
I also got a mission for you and you're gonna love it. Biggest. Hospital. Party. Ever.
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
He said the pain stops when I get my shit together and stop being a drugged out alcoholic mess. Could have just said no.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
I told her we had to stay at the bar until at least midnight because that's when my direct deposit hit, don't tell me i'm not responsible
I woke up at 2 AM to find them in my living room with a radio flyer wagon full of milk glass plates and a Holstein cow. How am I going to explain this to my landlord!?!
I don’t mind that he’s uncircumcised. It’s the fact that he talks about the Bible immediately after we have sex .
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