she really just asked how mermaids reproduce.
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
You drunkenly hook up with 5 people in one night and suddenly everyone tries to party with you.
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
I might have been the first person in 2015 to throw up on a yellow cab before climbing in it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I get stoned and write a 15 page history report in two hours. She gets stoned and cries because she "doesn't know which shade of pink is the real one".
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
All I’ve had today is sex and water. I think it’s time for tacos.
Bro, that'd be the third dick I've taken down in the office.
Just stalked the girl I hooked up with last night's boyfriend. He seems nice, I approve.
Welcome aboard the S.S. struggle. I'll be your captain for today's voyage and Jeremy is your first mate. Just sit back and relax while we navigate the seas of drunken regret. Your forecast for the day is violently hungover with a chance of "shit, that really did happen!"
Randomize