WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
by the end of the night i am guaranteed to have less of a face than Seal....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Great. I get laid, Leslie Nielsen dies. I can't have have sex anymore, the film community can't take another loss like this.
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
I can pinpoint my loss of innocence as the moment I started masturbating with my teddy bears
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
You lifted he top layer off his birthday cake and made it say 'eat me' in the cookie monster voice so yeah he knew.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
Trying to take a nap and my brain decides to play "lets have flashbacks every time you blew it with a chick in college". It's a montage of stupidity and youthful inexperience. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
Idk I wanna make it till midnight but I also want tequila
I saved a sauce packet from taco bell that said "Free me" to use in my next break up.
no no no no you can't just say your dirtiest secret is "i sat on goldfish by accident once" and just leave i have QUESTIONS
AT LEAST TELL ME IF THE GOLDFISH WAS STILL IN A BOWL??????????????