Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
i saw the 3rd guy i ever had sex with last night and kept calling him #3
Thank God they found balloon boy, I was afraid that Michael Jackson was ordering take out from heaven.
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
i am literally watching eva make a trashbag diaper for you to sleep in tonight. whole new level of low for you.
You act like this is the first time I literally thought I was invisible.
Right when he gets off the plane they're going straight to a party where you're only allowed in with a bottle of whisky and they are given bullet proof vests.
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
High school drama coach is wasted and wanted me to tell you that I’m good at flip cup and you should be very proud of me
Where the hell are you
Randomize
