to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
My autobiography is now tentatively titled "I'm Fucking the DJ, and Other Ways to Party for Cheap"
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
People are yelling about how much they want you here.
I'm going to change, vomit up my mexican food to save the trouble later, and then come meet you. Thrilled.
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
Chang gave me a 1.5 gallon beer tasting cup, i have a new boyfriend with a huge stick, Members of the Irish Rugby team slapped my ass and cheered for firmness, and a couple of strangers are naming the child after me. Best. Weekend.Ever.
My roommate just caught me cleaning a tostitos queso jar with my hand and eating it. He didn't judge. Bonding moment.
Best case scenario I do a bunch of dirty things to you, blow your mind and you enjoy it. Worst case I stare at you, poke at you, smile and droll on myself, you laugh.
I'm 4,715,723% sure I don't give a fuck.
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
Randomize
