I totally give up. Optimus Prime just fell from the top of the Great Pyramid into the hypostyle hall at Karnak.
Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
Listen. I don't care if its "nontoxic" im not putting it in my fucking vagina.
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
I just dropped $300 on lingerie. He better rip this off with his teeth.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
My liver needs the occasional pep talk and a reminder that we are two weeks into freshman year of college.
I'm like 'WOMAN, YOU'RE 62, RESHEATH THOSE COUGAR CLAWS.'
I don't think it's ever a good night if I'm this hung over and I didn't even get an orgasm out of the deal...
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
Just saw 4 of my students at Denny's at 4am on a Tuesday. We all pretended not to see each other, as we are all clearly tipsy and/or stoned. Class is in less than 4 hours. Either i'm getting too old for this shit or they're starting on the road to crazy-town much earlier these days.
Randomize