i'm gonna start putting 34DD under other qualifications on my bartender applications and see if that helps
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
Just hide your weed in your baby brothers shirt. TSA wont check a baby, thats fucked up
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
I think it might be brain cancer. Hangovers can't be this bad
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
Plus I'm on the toilet and I can only describe it as if someone had kicked the cap off of a fire hydrant.
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
If catching your vomit in my hands while swimming in a bath tub full of it doesn't make us best friends, I don't know what will
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
Omg my brain. Most recent thought: I fucking prayed in the bathroom that the other girl would leave. Prayed to Jesus
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
I just smoked weed out of a tomahawk, then chased an armadillo with said tomahawk, I love my life.
Randomize
