Happy Easter!!!
I'm an idiot
How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
He just became a fan of Chelsea Handler on Facebook. WHY DO I ALWAYS PICK THE GAY ONE
oh great, iTunes now thinks im gay.
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
I'm going to keep a tally of how many lives I ruin this summer. Starting today.
Already at 3 and it's not even noon.
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
Just got smoked out by my boss. Working in politics is great.
Have you ever had chicken nuggets while high? Because it tastes like hearing the Beatles for the first time
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
Randomize
