The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
Lady came into work yesterday. Full on stache and beard. I've never concentrated on making eye contact harder in my life.
eating taco bell the same day as formal = probably a bad idea
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
We're not too concerned with getting her out of jail. We're on a mission for donuts.
she's throwing a head of lettuce everywhere shouting HEADS UP and trying to get us to play catch with her. i'm scared.
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
I need a thor helmet and I need to find my heavy duty drinking mug
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
for real. if he messaged me that i'd have made his penis cower in a corner.
My girlfriend is pregnant with her exs baby. 2014 just became the worst year
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
Sorry I told all the other bridesmaids you were an asshole. I had had a few drinks and it's how I felt at the time.
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
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