So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
I like how the only thing you spelled correctly is "i'm tequila"
Apparently I was pointing at birds and yelling "YOU USED TO BE A DINOSAUR!!!"
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
Dear me: Drinking & crying tonight, my place, 9pm sharp. Love, your life
Oh, AND I met a ukulele teacher that I'd date. So there's that.
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
I'm ordering dildos in a santa hat. You?
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
There's lube on my homework. #priorities
Have you ever realized how weird it is to think that you've fucked someone and don't know what their handwriting looks like?
Randomize
