I'm gonna cuddle the shit out of you tomorrow
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
advice for life: when the cop takes your tallboy, don't ask for your coozy back
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
some bitch filled my sink with salsa.
Found myself carrying 2 bottles of .89 euro wine about half a mile to where im staying. and someone stopped me and spoke to english. apparently, i reek of drunk american.
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
Are cops allowed to hit on you if they're in uniform?! Serious question.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, I found this app that is basically a tamagochi from the 90's and now I finally have something to keep me busy at work!
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
you pulled out seven eyelashes and made me count them multiple times whilst crying hysterically.
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
Hey man, he's too drunk to remember what you said. What drugs are we buying and when should we expect them?
Randomize