Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
He knew exactly who I'd slept with after just one look at my crotch. He's like the Sherlock Holmes of cocks.
Nothing says "welcome to Denver" like a hot 18 year old giving you directions to the dispensary and ending up blowing you in the backseat
It's like Jesus got stoned and this would be the sandwiches he'd make
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
also somebody did cough syrup and i was really worried but i couldn’t express why properly so i was like MACKLEMORE SAYS NO
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
Let's be honest, I'm cooking chicken nuggets in my Helm jersey and underwear who has their life more together than me?
The Vicodin is in the strawberries.
You know you're an upperclassmen when you go to a party with no makeup, wet hair, weed socks, and no shoes, take a shot ski, then leave
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.