Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
We are two peas in an std pod
All I've consumed over the last couple days is Vanilla Coke, semen, and Coors. I don't think today will be any different.
you called your neighbor "slutsauce" then passed out on the stairway. not even sure why, but props to you.
Is a wave an appropriate goodbye when your one night stand wakes up and walks out towards the door while you are looking through the garbage for the evidence of a condom?
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
Im organizing a group to help fondle my shoe. Too many shots dude. Too many.
You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste.
I'm at a bar. It's body paint Wednesday. All of the waitresses are topless. Help me
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
Do you think there are other mothers looking at porn in the carpool line?
I should be free tonight unless my 5 speed vibrator arrives in the mail today, than we might have scheduling conflicts.
Alan said you can come over and eat me out anytime you want, as long as we give him enough notice to hide in the closet before we arrive
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Randomize
