FYI-Owning a kitty significantly lowers your chances of ever seeing mine...
well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
I just found her phone in the quesadilla maker...
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
Used my phone to vibrate 'eye of the tiger'. It's like Rocky is punching my nuts, but gently.
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
When that wave blew your top off I heard someone yell "SPANK BANK"
As a former fat girl, that's probably the best compliment I've ever received ever!
I wish I got like a congrats basket for being a responsible sexually active member of society complete with condoms, tissues and lollipops.
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
I just got baptized.
Drunkenly skinny dipping in a indoor hotel pool is not okay and does not count as a baptism.
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
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