i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
I decided it would be a good time to smoke on one of my deliveries but then I got the munchies and ate a piece of the pizza I was freaking out so I told him it was our new pacman pizza
you didnt know i had herpes?
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
He spanked me with a plate. I'm not sure where this is going...
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
We told her to calm down. She said "I'm Buddha!". Then army crawled to the cooler for more vodka.
Seeing Grandma lick chocolate sauce off of the male stripper was definitely not the way I planned to enter the world of legal drinking.
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
You know when you get a stripper pays your bail. You got good wood.
yeah, never be friends with someone with shitty eyebrows.. they obviously already make poor life choices
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
so like
i may have gotten a little bit of blood in the charging port of my phone
One day when i undoubtedly need an intervention please let it include lightsabers.
I think I can handle that.
I have decided that I would still fuck Harrison Ford even though he is old as fuck now. Do you think it would kill him?
Most likely. But I bet he'd do a bang up job of it before he died.
He absolutely would.
Randomize
