I'm currently googling how to make a dress out of a trash bag. It's going to be a great night.
hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
I love how all the girls on the plan b commercial wake up alone.. Like me
Theres a truck parked on the front yard and i just want to take this opportunity to tell you now that it is not my fault.
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
We decided to cut you off after you insisted on eating peanuts by the dumpster
I had ketchup on my elbow and a random girl goes "I got it" and licked it off, only on game day
You installed a beer holder in the shower?! You're the best roommate ever!
... That's a shower caddy.
I believe this is a toe-mate-toe vs. toe-maut-toe situation.
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
Why are there so many fucking Lambchop puppets hidden around my house?!
Can you bring home an IV stand and an empty bag so I can direct inject coffee for work tomorrow morning?
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
Let's just grow old together and be the crazy ladies that sit on the park bench, drinking booze from flasks and loudly talk about people who walk by.
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
Randomize
