wrigley field is MILF paradise
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
Why yes actually, getting stoned and reading an AARP magazine IS totally where I wanted my night to end!
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
Completely smashed, masturbating to the view of the ocean. Family vacations are more tolerable than I thought
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
All I want is to send a text that says "i slept with someone while wearing nothing but purple argyle socks this weekend." But the only person i would send that to is you. But you already know. Because they were your socks.
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
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