Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
I now have an ENTIRE drawer of unused disposable silverware from Boston Market... and you guys said I needed to "buy" kitchen stuff
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
please tell me i can get drunk off sparkling grape juice. even if you have to lie, please say yes.
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
Delete that photo of me. My ass looks WAY to good it in to be on Facebook for everyone to see. You gotta earn that shit.
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
You're the third person who's asked me for an afternoon blow connection in one day. Unreal.
That's more of a you-issue than a me-issue
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
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