Dude, you really need to stop hitting on girls by telling them you sang a cappella in college.
I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
i convinced her i was a yoga teacher by showing her some warm-ups my high school track coach made up
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
on a brighter note, the strip club found my atm card
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
Just saw pictures of a pregnant teen from my hometown with an American flag wrapped around her naked body posted on FB without irony. These are my roots.
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
Sexy intern needs to have caveman sex with me
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
Someone sitting next to me at this football game is totally eating chicken nuggets out of his pocket and drinking four loko. I wanna be him.
Randomize
