i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
The only thing worse than listening to you two fuck all night was waking up and smelling bacon and there not being any left.
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
shes making a cheerios necklace using dental floss 'just in case' she gets the munchies later
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
time out. can we just pause the wholesome understanding friendship thing and be fuck buddies for a night?
we need a secret handshake
If you walk into a place and someone says "happy birthday" while handing you a shot. You. Take. It.
Someone stole a lamp last night.
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