thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
I wiped my blood on their walls screaming "IT'S NOT MY SECURITY DEPOSIT!"
No she had like 2 shots and started ironing her clothes and whispering random shit in my ear
She is crazy, dude. She actually bit me on the gootch.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
Please tell me how I go from a guy with a coke problem to a cop. My own life doesn't even make sense to me anymore
I'm adopting to save the world from the moral outrage that would be my offspring
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What's that? Is there a bottle of Jack calling me? I think so...
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
If that pentatonix bullshit is playing when I get home we're breaking up
I'll be coming off of 7 days of not drinking. No horse tranqs either. I haven't been this sober since I was in the womb
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
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