Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
i wanted to tell my neighbors to shut up it was 4am, but listening to her rag on him for his minute man routine was actually entertaining
woman puking in liquor store parking lot at 9:30 on a tuesday morning = best commute ever.
The investigator asked if we were sharing a pitcher of margaritas. I corrected him and explained that we each had our own.
I just had to dig under a pile of condoms in my desk drawer to get to a blue book. Summer is officially over.
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
someone cut his neck open pretty bad with a broken beer bottle. We were so close to his house that we carried him home, but when we got there he casually laid on his bed and said he was just gonna sleep it off. WHO DOES THAT
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
I'm so high that hamburger just went up my nose. Mustard BURNS
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
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