I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
I wish orgasms lasted as long as the pain from rug burn
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
For the record, saying you're friends with the owner doesn't work when the owner is the one throwing you out.
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
I was literally convinced that the turkey wrap i was eating was keeping me alive. And i couldnt have been happier. That high.
You know I told you about that hammering at 3 AM yesterday? Turns out it was Holly beating the lock out of her door with a mallet because she'd forgotten her keys.
Doesn't she keep a spare?
Drunk Holly doesn't listen to Sober Holly's plans.
Finishing last nights 1.5L of wine and beef jerky for breakfast. Work looms, ever the prickly bitch.
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
We're doing a team debriefing of Saturday night in group text right now. As 75% of the female presence at that party we saw some shit.
My dick has a subreddit
It's only considered alcoholism if you're drinking from something other than a cup....right?
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