well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
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this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
I give you the lube, you make me the mac and cheese, that's a pretty fair deal I think.
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
I don't know what to tell you, usually I would just ask if they'd like to meet the captain. If you can't get laid it's your problem.
Just did a slip and slide down a five story staircase in my dorm. Being an engineer is fucking awesome
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The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
We just fucked each other sober. #goteam
This is why I should’ve just stuck with blow jobs. I’m good at blow jobs. Blow jobs never fail me.
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
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