dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
Yeah sketchy neighborhood.. Some woman ran by screaming, "i didn't steal anything" as some cops rolled up and arrested her.
Jenna and Ryan are ranting and raving about child custody. MY VASECTOMY SMILES.
I wish a night of watching Dear John and a bottle of wine could cure my herpes.
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
I want a MapMyFart App, where I can mark every spot where I have ripped one. Like here.
Drunk girl in a bikini just tried to bite my face, it's officially spring break
my poor anus
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
Help I accidentally unlocked this guy's tragic backstory and I need a rewind button!
And despite my lack of successful relationships I'm a fucking guru
That's like claiming you're a good coach but going 2-12 last season
Randomize
