We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
I look like a herd of wild horses chewed on my back. If you bite me again while taking me from behind, I'm going to have to cut you off.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
I'm going out w/ her for her b-day in a bit. I just talked to one of her drunk friends on the phone who asked if I could "handle 7 lesbian." This could be interesting.
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Turns out Edward 40 hands and life-sized jenga is really hard...Didn't stop you from trying. How is your concussion?
I just woke up on my neighbors floor with my boots on, but no pants. I have 3 separate taco bell receipts in my pocket.
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
Randomize