you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
I am here to underwhelm you with my vagina
I've figured out why I love winter sex. Because I make them leave the beanie on, and we all know I love a man in a beanie.
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
I went eBay shopping last night. Turns out I brought a Viking drinking horn. I can't even be mad.
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
You know you're high when, "Why can't I steal the duck?!" Becomes a serious question.
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
I think you're overestimating how drunk I was
You said your pillow felt like the ocean...
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