Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
so I called to to smoke and you didn't pick up so I smoked and now I'm a race car
My parents showed me my IQ test from fourth grade, I'm shitting on my potential.
don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
I'm not sure what happened last night, but my turtle seems afraid of me.
his mom called while we were having sex and asked if we could finish in his brothers room because her ceiling fan was about to fall on her bed
Ya I fucked her.. But now Melissa is gonna find out
Just tell her that in a man's never ending war between his heart and his dick... His heart never wins
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
He stood me up.
I'm no sure if I should be pissed or proud that he finally grew a backbone.
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.
We've been taking shots, cranking Marilyn Manson, and eating your bacon. Your kid is probably ruined.
Randomize
