Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
This guy legit just tried to LSAT formal logic his way into my pants. Contrapositives and everything.
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
If I die I have 2 requests one a viking funeral prye and 2 I want you to take over my facebook and haunt the fuck out of everyone
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
Masturbating on the clock at work is my specialty.
Dave, I love you but you're barking up the wrong lesbian. You sir are the competition. You don't threesome with competition.
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
Had sex with the Irish bartender in Spain. So that happened.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
You're officially the most high maintenance man I've ever had inside me.
Why does 2015 have to start with so many regrets?
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
My FIANCE just told me he thought you were the prettiest out of all my friends YOU WHORE
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
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