What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
Just had a drunken guest at my hotel threaten to "throw a fuckin fireball at my face"
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
Despite fighting the urge to vomit throughout the whole thing, I think that interview went really well!
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
Wow, im gonna be a great doctor..."hi let me save your life but first check out this pic of me deep throating a handle of grey goose"
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
It feels like my uterus is trying to crawl out of my ass wearing cleats. And yourself?
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
Owwwww. Yeah. I can barely move unless Im high on vicodin. We are bad at drinking/balancing. We will be the first to break hips and have to go into a home.
I feel like sleeping with foreign people is a long term investment. It's like a time share. Now when I go to London I have a place to stay.
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
Randomize
