Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
we're taking shots every time my dog licks his penis. we're on number 8 now.
you should have been aborted.
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
sooo....i just remembered that someone fed me a pretzel out of their purse at the bar last night.
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
Just keep in mind that she didn't start telling you you had the largest penis she had ever seen until AFTER she found out about your multi-million-dollar trust fund.
There are both cum and chocolate stains on my sheets. Can't decide whether this is a new low or a new high.
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
Well, if you're anything like me you'll get a lot of ass when you turn 30, so that's a plus
Bitch got stabbed in the eye. With a fork. Wait for it... At church. I was the only one at a party interested in her story. Only in the south
Randomize
