these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
His stupid grin looks like he's mid-ejaculation
He told me he wanted to break up so he could get "closer to God."
Does God suck his dick?
just took my abortion antibiotic with my martini. i no longer wonder how i got into this situation.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
No more vodka shots for you. Last night you begged a man on your knees to sell you his beard. He had no beard.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am pretty sure they consider me one of the "bros". They compliment girl's racks to me and are the human forms of dick-be-gone. They won't sleep with me more than once cause it's "weird", or let any "untrustworthy boys" sleep with me and I still help them get laid. Not...fair...
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
Nothing like a false "my-dad-found-my-weed" alarm on Christmas day.
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
I made out with a 40 year old and told her we were dating then got kicked out of a gay bar. This is the day I stop drinking.
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
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