Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
Todays outfit involves shorts with embroidered fish. This kids gonna die.
i can totally see doctors naming an STD after you
You owe me a new pair of headphones. You plugged mine into the top of a mustard bottle.
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
Oh my god, my vagina is cursed. He's cursed my vagina so that no one but him can maintain a boner around me. I'm sure of it.
I feel like I purchased a one way ticket to hell last night and its non refundable.
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
Randomize
