You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
it was like that last scene in "It's A Wonderful Life" but with alcohol
He just reenacted his orgasm in front of my roommates....using a squeeze bottle of mayonnaise.
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
I just realized, I'm going to be on my period for the end of the world. FUCK.
I jumped out of a moving car going sixty into my driveway because I had to shit so bad. It is not a good day today.
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
I am descending into that finals week rage fueled by ramen, mountain dew and bad sex is what's up.
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
I JUST NEEDED TO TELL YOU I JUST FUCKED TWO BOYS IN THE SPAN OF LIKE THREE HOURS AND ONE OF THEM WAS MY SISTERS PROM DATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL IM LOWKEY BOTH PROUD AND ASHAMED
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