i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
I woke up to 30 angry texts and her Chihuahua in my room. Can you drop him off for me?
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room?
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
All of my exes are either overweight and neckbearded or dead. Someone out there is looking out for me.
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
You said you liked how I put the cream cheese on.
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
Holy fuck where did this cat tattoo on my ass come from
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
So...I know we have a conversation later this week. But one of the key things I want to know is if I can specify having my body mummified and buried in Egypt (or at least nearby the Luxor in Vegas). How much money do you think that would cost? Do I need to increase my life insurance policy?
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