I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
i was watching iron chef and got motivated, so i made dinosaur chicken nuggets
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
he nicknamed his dick "too big to fail"
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
Found out why I didn't have to go drug test. My boss grew pot to pay for grad school.
He came to my house drunk at two a.m., got in the hot tub, refused to get out until he smoked a blunt, and said "That's what brothers and sisters are for."
3 things. 1) we need alcohol 2) we need alcohol 3) we need tortilla chips. Let's make a plan. Bro shakes and salsa.
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
Omg. We have to workout today. I just looked at myself in the mirror and thanked a god I don't believe in for drunken boys and dark rooms.
They ran out of toilet paper so I used the rug to wipe my vagina
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
Randomize
