are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
she makes me feel like im THAT guy in the taylor swift song
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
There's a person in my phone named motor boat. I love making new friends.
Don't ask me how, but I have a squirrel in my backpack and I don't know what to do with it.
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
Don't patronize me, I thought of that on peyote, so it was basically like a message from God.
You texted me the words "butt stuff" 53 times in a four hour period last night.
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
Just shaved my balls on a moving train. By far the most dangerous stunt I've ever pulled
Randomize
