is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
While sitting in bed naked eating ramen and watching the colbert report I realize why random sex happens.
i'm at a baby shower....never been happier to not be having sex currently
I just hotboxed my laundry basket.
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
I just took a shower and found half a cookie melted under my boob. Please tell me there's a reason
Just saw a tranny in a skimpy captain america costume walking around campus. Going to follow her. You gotta see this
I will not be a drunk bitch. I will not be a drunk bitch. Chanting this until it's second nature.
Drinking in moderation can be fun. Drinking in moderation can be fun. Chanting this until it becomes true.
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
I brought him flowers on my way home from cheating on him. Boyfriend of the year award right here.
No one will ever find true happiness until they have gotten stoned and taken off the bra they've been wearing all day.
You, my dear friend, are a poet of the deep mental longings of women worldwide.
Who'd have thought a guy with a lisp would be so good with his tongue?
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
when she didn't finish her burrito you wanted to call the cops because you said it was neglect
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