That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
Im pretty sure he just said he wants to make a baby with me, but he's pretty shitfaced, so I'm not sure if he knows who I am.
I'll wind up on his doorstep with a confused "oh you live here" expression, a feigned ankle injury and a seemingly fortunately placed bottle of tequila. I don't care what it takes: HIS MOUTH WILL BE ON MOUTH.
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
I passed out drunk and Jane had created a picnic on my chest. I had chips and a hamburger laid out on my boobs. The only reason I woke up is she was trying to feed me too.
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
Omg that was my second thought of the morning.
First was that we had pop tarts.
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
I think you handled your pregnancy scares better than that cricket in your bathroom
I swear to god if you keep eating my cats food drunk I am going to kick you out of our apartment.
Randomize
