Ur dog is a babe magnet. Reminds me of me
ew. I made a sandwich, and the cheese reminded me of her vagina
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
My mom just called and reminded me not to throw up in any cabs tonight. Happy St. Patty's Day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
Year anniversary in a month. Think I'll just give him a COME ON MY FACE FREE card. I'm both broke and shameless.
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's definitively the wine. Every time I can drink and work I feel like I win at the game of life.
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
You grabbed my shirt and said, "hope you're not attached" and ripped it off before I could answer you.
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
Change of plans & whoring it up tonight
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
Randomize