i gained so much weight this year, i put on my string bikini underwear and couldnt see the string anymore! i hate my life.
Nobody needs to come anywhere. Except on your face.
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
We don't need a hotel, we'll just sleep in the post office.
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
He literally took a shit in my bathroom and then broke up with me.
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
moral of my life: don't tell a guy you want to have sex with him. he'll get back together with his ex.
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
Dude, someone puked in my washing machine last night, I tried turning it on to clean it...not a good idea
I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.
Randomize
