ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
note to self..putting cheap vodka in a bottle of grey goose does not make it taste better
last night they convinced you that a sharpie was a new style of chap stick... so when you wake up, you might want to do something about that
I'm sorry that spending new years with you was fucking my boyfriend in your bathroom multiple times
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
How are ur friends?
One is peeing in the grass and the other is asleep under the stairs. Fuck them I'm sleeping in the car
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
I just woke up and my ass is covered in honey and my eye brows are shaved off.
You walked in with a bag of weed and asked for a watermelon. For some reason they actually gave you one, and you made it into a perfectly working bong. Two of them offered their girlfriends to you for the night.
no i'm going to the dr today, he fucking banshee-shrieked in my ear as he was coming and now i can't hear out of it
Why is the turtle in the toilet again?
Well as I was puking in the tub I put him in there to keep me company but I am almost positive the original setup was him in the tub and me next to the toilet...I hope he likes tequila
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
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