Dual....:-)
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
I can't decide who is the bigger alcoholic: you for opening that bottle of wine just now or me for hearing it in the other room over the air conditioner
Why do I have the 4 of hearts in my bra?
Haha we got sick of drinking on 4 is for whores so we stole the cards...I woke up with three of them in mine
drunken problem solving at its finest
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
Also did I tell you guys about the time that I balled for like an hour at a frat and made them play wagon wheel and then cleaned their bathroom
Ran out of eye drops right after putting them in one eye. Half baked at work.
he asked me why I let you steal the gnome, and you jumped out of the bathroom, yelled "you know why!" and ran outside with said gnome
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
Randomize
